Sabina

I noticed in the weeks before the "big Panic news" recently, that Ryan Ross is posting "The Kinks" songs on Twitter... By that time I just thought, wow we have the same taste in music, but now it could be interpreted as a hint at "forthcoming occurences".

Just read the lyrics to this The Kinks song ("A Rock 'N' Roll Fantasy"):

Hello you, hello me, hello people we used to be
Isn't it strange, we never changed
We've been through it all yet we're still the same
And I know it's a miracle, we still go, and for all we know
We might still have a way to go

Hello me, hello you, you say you want out
Want to start anew, throw in your hand
Break up the band, start a new life, be a new man
But for all we know, we might still have a way to go
Before you go, there's something you ought to know

There's a guy in my block, he lives for rock
He plays records day and night
And when he feels down, he puts some rock 'n' roll on
And it makes him feel alright
And when he feels the world is closing in
He turns his stereo way up high

He just spends his life, living in a rock 'n' roll fantasy
He just spends his life, living on the edge of reality
He just spends his life, in a rock 'n' roll fantasy
He just spends his life, living in a rock 'n' roll fantasy
He just spends his life, living on the edge of reality
He just spends his life, in a rock 'n' roll fantasy
He just spends his life, livingt in a rock 'n' roll fantasy

Look at me, look at you
You say you've got nothing left to prove
The King is dead, rock is done
You might be through but I've just begun
I don't know, I feel free and I won't let go
Before you go, there's something you ought to know

Dan is a fan and he lives for our music
It's the only thing that gets him by
He's watched us grow and he's seen all our shows
He's seen us low and he's seen us high
Oh, but you and me keep thinking
That the world's just passing us by

Dont' want to spend my life, living in a rock 'n' roll fantasy
Don't want to spend my life living on the edge of reality
Don't want to waste my life, hiding away anymore
Don't want to spend my life, living in a rock 'n' roll fantasy...

Now that's.... pretty odd, isn't it? But anyway, Mr. Ross has a great taste in music.

Monday, july 6th. Late afternoon. I was heading to the super market, just putting on my shoes and talking to my mom about what to buy, and suddenly my little sister runs out of her room just telling me: "Hey...Ryan is leaving the band. It was just on Twitter" ...I only responded: "OK, now I'm gonna have an accident" laughed and left. Honestly, I didn't believe her. At all. But I drove around in my car for about an hour thinking about what consequences that would have for me if it was true.

Back home my sister showed me the tweet. I can't recall my thoughts in that moment now... total blackout... all I remember is, I typed "Beatles" into the iTunes searchbar.

...

I didn't sleep that night, listened to The Kinks, searched for more information, and finally somehow ended up listening to The Doors on my ipod. This is the end, beautiful friend

Now that I'm writing this, I feel better...almost over it all. There's still some disbelief. I feel like a mother who cast out her beloved children, because they disappointed her. Picture that.

Please leave a comment, if you feel like it. I'm also sharing "thoughts" on this topic on Twitter, which kinda helped me sort my mind in the last few days. 

http://www.twitter.com/sabina_d_